Several times in my life I have reached frontiers, places from where no straight path forward seemed possible. The last significant one was the death of my husband six years ago. He was older than myself, and I had cared for him for a number of years. The last several weeks were especially difficult, but there was peace in those last moments, when I observed his last breath. I was grateful for those 37 years of our joined life. Now I was single again. It felt a bit strange to realize that in his passing he had given me the gift of freedom to pursue things I hadn’t been able to do. My poetic voice had fallen silent, but now I discovered that not only my brother had inherited my father’s gift for photography. The occasion was joining alone my gratefulness family on an Alaska cruise. I felt I needed to document it for those who could not participate. It was the first step in regaining some of that ‘can do’ spirit of years past.

Some of the practical letting go meant giving away my husbands clothing, knowing that there were men out there in need of it. It was harder to part with his beloved red scooter, but I knew friends who could use and treasure it. So often I had moved the ramps for him to get out of the house and down the steps to the sidewalk, and the walked beside him. Perhaps it can stand for those shoes left at the shore…..

I’ve been thinking about this for some time now. We usually talk about life’s journey, but perhaps pilgrimage is a better term. To me it implies a greater willingness to accept hardships, and and a more intentional moving toward the fulfillment of my life which is union with the divine. Looking back at the various stages along the way, there were many joys and plenty of tough times, but I am grateful for having been blessed with a positive outlook, and everything I needed to support me.