My challenge today was a modest one: I felt a bit lonely where I currently am (in Bahia, Brazil) after I didn’t hear back from a few people I had reached out to. As I was walking by myself on an almost empty beach I was wondering whether I should really go ahead and make the commitment to launch a big new phase of my research here? Funny enough, as I returned to the beach hut, I met a group of Brazilian women, with one of whom I ended up talking animatedly – about French social theory, of all things! And as I mentioned to her that I was questioning my research because of loneliness, she smiled at me from the side and said: Didn’t God give you an answer right now?
How does the challenge of temporary loneliness help to embrace the world in a more expansive way? Today taught me to be still, to listen, and to embrace the moments of quiet and silence, rather than find them worrisome. They may lead to the most unexpected encounters and “actor-networks” (with a nod to French sociologists).

This one is so easy! Five years ago I just started on the third (and added on top of two regular) years of course work for a PhD, after being deemed “not ready for general exams.” Not a particularly uplifting moment. This morning I got up, read email compliments for the video welcome messages for over 100 students I am going to teach this fall, did yoga with the view into an amazing garden in Brazil, and am now getting ready to continue with my research on cocoa here in Bahia. And I am in touch with friends back at my new home in Spain. Pinch me!

When I manage to roll out of bed and to wander to a yoga session down the street, all sleepy, and then have a wonderful time there, breathing, stretching, seeing the world upside down, meditating, pondering some big questions and laughing with our attempts at answering them. And then leaving the place with a bit of extra buoyancy in my steps. Plus a good cup of coffee and a chat with my mom on Whatsapp (or Zap, as they would say in Brazil). Now I’m alive. On to work, to think and to write with that wind in my sails.

Antoinette, as the daughter of parents who have gone through this process I hear your pain and yes, I agree that there is economic suffering, especially for women. I send you best wishes and I hope that the light at the end of this will soon shine!. Sharing my observations: my parents have come to a better place, perhaps not economically but emotionally. Incredibly, they are on a holiday together right now (and this is still not the happy-end kind of story). I would have never thought this possible when they were in the midst of ugly negotiations. Do take good care of yourself, as much as possible. You have my support.