Daily Question, January 12 When have I offered someone authentic forgiveness? What did I learn? 45 Reflections Share Click here to cancel reply.Please log in or Create a Profile to post a comment. Notify me when someone replies to my comment via e-mail. Kevin6 years agoKevinMany years ago my professional and my ministerial reputations were maligned by a person who struggled deeply with personal demons and very old hurts. Seven years later I received a thoughtful note of apology from this person, long after the damage had been done and I had moved on. I decided that the work of forgiveness was easier to undertake than carrying the weight of anger around with me each day. I run in to this person several times a year and the greeting is lighter and gentler than it onc... Many years ago my professional and my ministerial reputations were maligned by a person who struggled deeply with personal demons and very old hurts. Seven years later I received a thoughtful note of apology from this person, long after the damage had been done and I had moved on. I decided that the work of forgiveness was easier to undertake than carrying the weight of anger around with me each day. I run in to this person several times a year and the greeting is lighter and gentler than it once was, which I take as a gift I gave myself. Still, for practical purposes and with a dose of reality from working with people all my life, I confess to also holding close the words of John F. Kennedy, who said, “Forgive your enemies but never forget their names.” So a higher plain of forgiveness yet exists, but I am content to leave that perch to the saints beyond. Read More2 Reply John6 years agoJohnKevin, I think you are spot on. Some people think forgiveness means you are allowing that person to hurt you again. The repairing of the relationship is another matter. The person who broke your trust has to rebuild it with you. 1 Reply Aine6 years agoAineThe book by Lewis Smedes called The Art of Forgiving made this point very well. He delineated the difference between forgiveness and reconciliation. The first has nothing to do with the other person's behavior. You can forgive someone who is dead or not safe to interact with for whatever reason. Forgiving is about freeing us from being shackled to the pain of the past. It does NOT mean the relationship continues. That is the difference. Reconciliation requires that the other party ad... The book by Lewis Smedes called The Art of Forgiving made this point very well. He delineated the difference between forgiveness and reconciliation. The first has nothing to do with the other person’s behavior. You can forgive someone who is dead or not safe to interact with for whatever reason. Forgiving is about freeing us from being shackled to the pain of the past. It does NOT mean the relationship continues. That is the difference. Reconciliation requires that the other party adhere to a certain standard of behavior, which the forgiver gets to set, such as not lying, stealing, slandering, etc. If the forgiven person does not stop the behavior that required forgiving in the first place, chances are the relationship will not continue, though the forgiveness does. So many people are taught forgiving means the person who hurt you gets another pass or a get out of jail free card, and they cannot standcthe thought, probably for good reason. Sadly, this keeps them from experiencing the freedom of letting go. I love your last quote! Read More1 Reply « Previous 1 2 My Private Gratitude Journal Write an entry in your private gratefulness journal Get Started This site is brought to you by A Network for Grateful Living, a 501(c)(3) nonprofit. All donations are fully tax deductible in the U.S.A. CONTRIBUTE https://demo.gratefulness.org/content/uploads/2015/03/GX-Gold-Participant-L.png Community Engagement Guidelines Privacy Policy [email protected] Connect with us on Social Media: © 2000 - 2024, A Network for Grateful Living Website by Briteweb
