Daily Question, May 12 What can those whom I struggle with teach me about love? 26 Reflections Share Click here to cancel reply.Please log in or Create a Profile to post a comment. Notify me when someone replies to my comment via e-mail. KC7 years agoKCWhat can my ‘enemies’ teach me about love? So much more than my ‘friends’ and acquaintances. They challenge me to surrender and draw closer to the source to find a place of patience, kindness and love. An ongoing mystery and challenge. Ever learning, I hope! 3 Reply Francine Marie Tolf7 years agoFrancine Marie TolfI don't have any personal "enemies," but I am thinking of ISIS, of which I can say not one good thing. Frankly, this organization seems to me like evil personified. What can a member of ISIS teach me about love? That in the face of hatred, torture, mass rape, destruction of cities and sacred art, love can exist. I don't know if it exists in the heart of any ISIS soldier, but I am sure it exists in the hearts of the women, men and children they enslave. I can remember that in the burned out ... I don’t have any personal “enemies,” but I am thinking of ISIS, of which I can say not one good thing. Frankly, this organization seems to me like evil personified. What can a member of ISIS teach me about love? That in the face of hatred, torture, mass rape, destruction of cities and sacred art, love can exist. I don’t know if it exists in the heart of any ISIS soldier, but I am sure it exists in the hearts of the women, men and children they enslave. I can remember that in the burned out rubble of Aleppo, love is in many hearts. Read More3 Reply Antoinette7 years agoAntoinetteFrancine, I understand that any hate group is hard to understand. Hatred does not cease by hatred, but only by love; this is the eternal rule. Buddha I hope that we can focus on the light of compassion and love to grow during these times. Like dr. Martin Luther King Junior said : Only light can heal the darkness. ( I’m paraphrasing ) 2 Reply Anna7 years agoAnnaI’m with you Francine, and maybe we are here at the same time! Do you remember that attack in Egypt, during Easter time, when a lot of people was killed while praying in their churches? People didn’t show hate, rather, they kept on their faith. True courage, True faith, I believe. 1 Reply Francine Marie Tolf7 years agoFrancine Marie TolfYes, I remember that horrific attack. Yes, what courage, Anna! 1 Reply Ben7 years agoBenI couldn't resist looking up the roots of "enemy" for clarity regarding this mysterious and powerful word. Apparently it comes from the Latin "inimicus," which is a combo of "in" (meaning not) and "amicus" (meaning friend). So, going by this definition, what can I learn from someone who's not my friend, who I may not be allowing myself to feel connected to and caring toward on some level? It seems I learn where my own heart is closed, where I'm projecting unwanted aspects of myself, and w... I couldn’t resist looking up the roots of “enemy” for clarity regarding this mysterious and powerful word. Apparently it comes from the Latin “inimicus,” which is a combo of “in” (meaning not) and “amicus” (meaning friend). So, going by this definition, what can I learn from someone who’s not my friend, who I may not be allowing myself to feel connected to and caring toward on some level? It seems I learn where my own heart is closed, where I’m projecting unwanted aspects of myself, and where the depths of my aliveness are not fully seen and embraced (by myself)… Read More5 Reply Anna7 years agoAnnaSo true, Ben. I often noticed that something I didn’t like in other people was an aspect of my own nature that was causing me some problems. Shifting my attitude…..the miracle happened, that fellow could even be an “amicus”! 2 Reply Palm7 years agoPalmI like knowing the roots of words, thanks Ben, for this and also for your interesting insight 1 Reply Palm7 years agoPalmI have some enemies: loneliness, anxiety, fear. They pop in every now and then and I guess they are teaching me to trust love. Just yesterday loneliness visited, and remembering one of my friends made it dissipate. 3 Reply Mary7 years agoMaryHi Palm. I find it so interesting that I can be really hurting over something, and then look at it another way, or consider something that I was not thinking about, and the pain just goes away. In the Gratitude Lounge section of this website, Gary, just a day or two ago suggested the following: consider what triggered the pain, and then look at what need or insecurity I have that caused this trigger to be so hurtful. Then I can deal with the real issue and the trigger is no longer important. ... Hi Palm. I find it so interesting that I can be really hurting over something, and then look at it another way, or consider something that I was not thinking about, and the pain just goes away. In the Gratitude Lounge section of this website, Gary, just a day or two ago suggested the following: consider what triggered the pain, and then look at what need or insecurity I have that caused this trigger to be so hurtful. Then I can deal with the real issue and the trigger is no longer important. (These are my words, and interpretation of what Gary said. Look in the Gratitude Lounge to read this in his words.) His suggestion just helped me get past a hurtful question question that was asked of me a few hours ago. I was able to see that the real issue was not the question. The real insecurity that was triggered is my fear of not being good enough. Once I could see that, the question lost its sting and I began to feel much better. Mary Read More0 Reply Palm7 years agoPalmThank you Mary, so much, yes we need to look deeper in ourselves, I will definetly look at Gary’s comment in the gratitude lounge, I have found help there before, for example, Ursula re-introduced me to Louise Hay who insists that changing your thoughts can change your life (which relates to what you said). I learned that she’s also overcome big challenges in life. Love, Palm 1 Reply Amor fati7 years agoAmor fatiSay yes to life always. To start my gratitude meditation with trying to label someone in my life my “enemy” is counterproductive. Are these questions passed through an editor? 1 Reply Deb7 years agoDebLike others here, the word 'enemy' seems too strong. 'Adversary' or 'opponent' might be a better option. I am in the midst of a difficult situation as Mothers Day approaches. I have a beloved adult daughter who is involved with a fundamental christian church has sent me this week a vicious email delineating the terrible harm I have caused her as a child. Her memories are not commensurate with my other adult children's memories nor with my own. I do not recognize the person she has described as... Like others here, the word ‘enemy’ seems too strong. ‘Adversary’ or ‘opponent’ might be a better option. I am in the midst of a difficult situation as Mothers Day approaches. I have a beloved adult daughter who is involved with a fundamental christian church has sent me this week a vicious email delineating the terrible harm I have caused her as a child. Her memories are not commensurate with my other adult children’s memories nor with my own. I do not recognize the person she has described as myself. We have opposing memories. Is she my enemy? No. But there is an obvious missing of the mark, or sin, if accurate definitions are used. As I consider my response to her email, I keep asking myself, “what would Love do?” What is in her best interest? What is in my best interest? As of this moment, I have no ready answer, but the question continues and I listen carefully for what Love is revealing. Read More5 Reply Palm7 years agoPalmDeb, I’ve heard we cannot change people, only God can, and I can almost hear Love saying that you will be there for your daughter when that happens. 1 Reply Deb7 years agoDebThank you, Palm. 1 Reply John7 years agoJohnMaybe we can replace the word enemy with rivals. And by that, I mean those individuals with whom we “bang heads” with. If we can respect them and understand that as persons they are the sum of their life experiences we will gain a greater perspective. 2 Reply Betsy7 years agoBetsyI am glad the word "enemy" is in quotes, as like others who have responded here, it is not a word that is part of my own personal experience. I honestly can say that I do not have any enemies (that I am aware of, lol!) However, there are people who have inflicted great harm and what felt like dangerous and hateful deeds upon me. I am a survivor of domestic violence. I stayed in the relationship for a very long time...trying my best to put one foot in front of the other and support a very ment... I am glad the word “enemy” is in quotes, as like others who have responded here, it is not a word that is part of my own personal experience. I honestly can say that I do not have any enemies (that I am aware of, lol!) However, there are people who have inflicted great harm and what felt like dangerous and hateful deeds upon me. I am a survivor of domestic violence. I stayed in the relationship for a very long time…trying my best to put one foot in front of the other and support a very mentally ill person who also struggled with addiction, while at the same time raising my young children and going through cancer and then job loss myself. What my abuser taught me about love (and 5 years out and into safety I am still learning this lesson), actually has more to do with self love. That there comes a time when the right thing to do is to step away to safety however you can do it. And that the gradual process of letting go and self forgiveness does not mean you need to let this person back into your life. It also taught me empathy for others in my situation, and never to judge. Sometimes we simply feel trapped and cannot see a way out. He also taught me about the power of love of all of those people who surrounded me in their loving embrace and stepped up to help when I really needed it. Lesson learned: the power of giving and receiving with grace. Read More8 Reply kathleen7 years agokathleenLove includes all. Enemies shows us where we are missing the mark maybe. 2 Reply Deb7 years agoDebI agree but would clarify and add that “enemies show us where the mark is being missed.” since it may not necessarily be us who has missed the mark, especially if you don’t even know someone considers you an enemy and you believe you have no enemies. 0 Reply kathleen7 years agokathleenYes Deb, I would agree If we are open, forgiving and receptive to all who have hurt us then we have no enemies and what a nice way to live- in peace. How they view us is their soul’s journey. 1 Reply Michael7 years agoMichaelWho has enemies? Is it not just a viewpoint? Our systems inadvertently create opposites, and then contrary support systems. Together, one to one, we can make peace. 3 Reply Kevin7 years agoKevinI have enemies? That’s the first I have heard of such. If we want to learn more about love, describing another human being as my enemy makes love even more difficult to reach. 4 Reply Antoinette7 years agoAntoinetteEnemy may be a harsh word to define other beings we come in contact with. The people who test us in many ways we may not want to be tested, have a lot to teach us about ourselves and who we really are. We could actually thank them for opening our eyes to our habitual reaction patterns! They help us take radical responsibility! They test us to our core and make us live on the razors edge of the Now. They help us to reflect on who we really are. These challenging situations or circumsta... Enemy may be a harsh word to define other beings we come in contact with. The people who test us in many ways we may not want to be tested, have a lot to teach us about ourselves and who we really are. We could actually thank them for opening our eyes to our habitual reaction patterns! They help us take radical responsibility! They test us to our core and make us live on the razors edge of the Now. They help us to reflect on who we really are. These challenging situations or circumstances are an awakening of sorts. The awakening of the “I” looking inward. The introspective space is created in the messiest places. When we come in contact with an uncomfortable situation it creates our minds ego. We could call this a trigger. That’s when our choice of attitude comes in. We then and there MUST give our full awareness to our being-ness or we lose clear sightedness! I believe that these so called “enemies” are a wake up call for us to be in the present moment with open awareness full of gratitude for life. Brother David says, “Say yes to life always!” Each moment is a gift like the thought of the day express. By not working against the flow of any given moment, we can rest in whatever is and take action from there. My intention is to be open life’s present, which is the gift of love and truth in the here and now. The light of the world is in me and im going to let it shine. I’m truly grateful that my “enemies” – any challenging situation, have taught me to wake up to life’s treasures which reside in me always. Read More5 Reply sparrow7 years agosparrowBeautifully said, dear Antoinette! 0 Reply Louiseds7 years agoLouisedsThe power of ‘eneminess’ can overcome us at times of conlict. I wonder what it would be like to experience that same power as love? Love must be as all- encompassing. That is big! 2 Reply Christina7 years agoChristinaInteresting question. Don’t think I have any “enemies,” per se, although I do wonder who has “keyed” my car for two successive cars now. I guess somebody doesn’t like me! 2 Reply My Private Gratitude Journal Write an entry in your private gratefulness journal Get Started This site is brought to you by A Network for Grateful Living, a 501(c)(3) nonprofit. All donations are fully tax deductible in the U.S.A. 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