Daily Question, January 26 How can I be a better friend? 40 Reflections Share Click here to cancel reply.Please log in or Create a Profile to post a comment. Notify me when someone replies to my comment via e-mail. 6 years agoMy best friends encourage me to laugh and I love making my friends laugh too. There is no greater bond than sharing a laugh about some daily absurdity or even oneself. Friends don’t let each other take themselves too seriously. You can just be. 0 Reply Hot Sauce6 years agoHot SauceI can be a better friend by always saying hello to passersby and to people I know and letting my friends know when I go to events so I can take them with me. 1 Reply Val DeBruno6 years agoVal DeBrunoThis is a very hard one for me. I recently broke up with my best friend of six years, and I'm feeling very isolated in my life. I think the message for me this year is to learn how to present and loving for myself. I've wanted so badly to be first to everyone. To be the best, most lovable person. For people to want me. I've realized today even my spirituality has been based on being wanted more than others - this time not by humans, but by God (crazy, I know lol). So, I guess the best way I can ... This is a very hard one for me. I recently broke up with my best friend of six years, and I’m feeling very isolated in my life. I think the message for me this year is to learn how to present and loving for myself. I’ve wanted so badly to be first to everyone. To be the best, most lovable person. For people to want me. I’ve realized today even my spirituality has been based on being wanted more than others – this time not by humans, but by God (crazy, I know lol). So, I guess the best way I can be a good friend to others (which I’m realizing I’ve never ever really been) is to be a good friend to myself. And to be honest – I have no idea how to start, but maybe writing this and recognizing this gaping hole in my heart is the first step. Read More3 Reply petra6 years agopetraTake care of myself, and give to my friends only what i can actually give so that I don’t become bitter and the relationship sour. When with them give them my attention and remember to see their stories from their perspective without judging them. 0 Reply GT6 years agoGTNever be too busy to talk or to meet. Try to listen without being judgmental. 0 Reply Anita6 years agoAnitaListen. Show up when possible Walk. Pray. Listen some more. Love unconditionally. 1 Reply LSM6 years agoLSMI need to learn how to be a friend to myself first… Only then I will be able to answer this question. 3 Reply KC6 years agoKCThe more I am able to be a good friend to myself, the more I am able to be a good friend to others. The poem ‘Please call me by all my true Names’ by Thich Nhat Hanh reminds me to be as honest and truthful with my self as I can – the good, bad and ugly, and to bring that honesty, awareness and patience to those I meet. This is the theory. The practice is breath by breath … 1 Reply Chester6 years agoChesterCompassionate effort and honesty 2 Reply Trevor6 years agoTrevorI can be more honest with myself. How can I be honest with others if I am not honest with myself first? 3 Reply Javier Visionquest6 years agoJavier VisionquestMany of my associations are accidents of proximity and circumstances. “Friend” is not a word I use lightly. But those I’ve chosen, the Noble Friend, you are a reflection of my deeds, my inner yearnings, my aspirations, my nascent possibilities. You uncover these aspects in me where as I do not perceive them, as a flame does not burn itself, nor a blade cut itself. When we see in a reflection something we don’t like, do we seek to transform the image in the reflection or do we correct the... Many of my associations are accidents of proximity and circumstances. “Friend” is not a word I use lightly. But those I’ve chosen, the Noble Friend, you are a reflection of my deeds, my inner yearnings, my aspirations, my nascent possibilities. You uncover these aspects in me where as I do not perceive them, as a flame does not burn itself, nor a blade cut itself. When we see in a reflection something we don’t like, do we seek to transform the image in the reflection or do we correct the matter within ourselves? Read More3 Reply Sylvie6 years agoSylvieI feel iritation in me with a question like today. It creates a gap between what is and what “should” be and that doesn’t feel good to me. It reminded me of a sign thats at the entrance to a village, it says “we’ve got it nicer here” and everytime I drive by there I feel a sting, why not say we’ve got it really nice here and you can drive on and feel, yes, its really nice here and where I live, it’s also really nice. 2 Reply Anna6 years agoAnnaDear Sylvie I love your honest and intriguing reply. I believe that in the "here and now" of the daily life, every honest human beings behaves in the best way. Yet every honest human beings knows that his/her awareness is always a work in progress. Today I understand boring aspects of some friends, more than in the past. So, I can be a better friend not because I am comparing my behaviour with others' one, but with mine, without pressure, without judgment. For me, mercy has always to be the ba... Dear Sylvie I love your honest and intriguing reply. I believe that in the “here and now” of the daily life, every honest human beings behaves in the best way. Yet every honest human beings knows that his/her awareness is always a work in progress. Today I understand boring aspects of some friends, more than in the past. So, I can be a better friend not because I am comparing my behaviour with others’ one, but with mine, without pressure, without judgment. For me, mercy has always to be the basis of every effert to understand human nature. Hope I have not annoyed you with this too much long reply…. Read More3 Reply Palm6 years agoPalmYes, mercy is the key to friendship dear Anna, as David Whyte said, and I agree with Aine that you always show it, thank you and Sylvie for this reflections 0 Reply Sylvie6 years agoSylvieCara Anna, grazie for your heartfelt answer. 2 Reply Aine6 years agoAineYour mercy always shows, Cara Anna. 2 Reply Francine Marie Tolf6 years agoFrancine Marie TolfYears have taught me the wisdom of remembering that one friend can never be all things for me, and it is unfair to expect this. Maybe one friend really appreciates and supports my writing, for example, but is not a great listener. Maybe another makes me laugh and see new perspectives but isn’t the most dependable. Celebrate the good in friends and know you can go to various people for various needs. 9 Reply Teresa Kerr6 years agoTeresa KerrAbsolutely! That is also my philosophy on friendships, Francine 🙂 0 Reply Anita6 years agoAnitaIsn’t it wonderful to have variety. I feel the same way Francine. Thank you for sharing. 1 Reply Sr. Mary Alice Aschenbach6 years agoSr. Mary Alice AschenbachI can be a better friend by listening to the other, by seeing the other, by quieting myself so that I can hear the other and not just hear and listen to me. For me listening is key. 1 Reply kathleen6 years agokathleenI need to be a better friend to myself. When I nurture, forgive and am compassionate to myself I am more likely to be a friend in the universe. 3 Reply Gina6 years agoGinaby reminding myself constantly that I too am like my friends, deserving of kindness, love, patience, acceptance, understanding……. practice doing unto my friends as I wish for myself… how sweet the gift of a true friend 1 Reply Michael6 years agoMichaelI’m pretty expansive in my definition of friend. i.e. I spend time each morning preparing myself to be a friend in the moment of need to as many people as possible each day. the moment of need could be listening to a story of humor, of horror, of pain, of joy and then if need be real strategies to work through that story towards a better outcome. time is valuable in any friendship. my close and longtime friends deserve more time and energy that is meaningful. 2 Reply Palm6 years agoPalmRecently I learned in a painful way that I need to say ” I didn’t like that” in the moment. If I dismiss my feelings or try to convince myself that it wasn’t a big deal anyway, my subconscious will come up with less than gracious ways, while I am completely unaware, to balance things out, which of course won’t. 7 Reply Nancy6 years agoNancyA lesson I am still working on but getting better at it for sure. 2 Reply Palm6 years agoPalmMe too Nancy, at almost 50 0 Reply Anna6 years agoAnnaPerfectly said, Palm. 2 Reply Francine Marie Tolf6 years agoFrancine Marie TolfYes, I have trouble speaking certain feelings at the time! I think we’re conditioned (women especially) to say to ourselves, “it’s no big deal, let it go,” – but that is usually bad advice. If something hurts or angers or embarrasses you, SAY SO – then let it go. Believe me, at almost 60 years old, I am still trying to do this gracefully. 5 Reply Palm6 years agoPalmThank you Francine, I think it is a good quality to pause before speaking but not to stay silent, so your words SAY SO in capital letters will be a good reminder for me when needed 0 Reply Rich6 years agoRichI can be a better friend by giving more of myself. 1 Reply Barbara Morris6 years agoBarbara MorrisDeeply listening, asking questions, and then following up with a gesture or gift that lets them know I heard. 2 Reply 1 2 Next » My Private Gratitude Journal Write an entry in your private gratefulness journal Get Started This site is brought to you by A Network for Grateful Living, a 501(c)(3) nonprofit. All donations are fully tax deductible in the U.S.A. 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